Tag Archives: destiny

Redefining Moments



Jeremiah 33:2-3 “Thus says the Lord who made earth, the Lord who formed it to establish it – the Lord is his name: Call to me and I will answer you, and will tell you great and hidden things that you have not known.”

I have asked myself ten times over: Who am I? In the past, I would banish any self-doubt by rushing into an ill-prepared answer without over-thinking the truth behind that question. Frankly, I did not want to be honest with myself. I wanted to find a quick definition that would connect me with those I was trying to impress. Have you not ever tried to press yourself into two or three molds in order to reflect back the same visage or personality embodied by the environment of people you wish to impress or be accepted by? Whether you have or not, I have. And, it began to wear me thin. I became obsessed with defining myself as others may see me, and in the process, I forgot that only one set of eyes are worthy of my impression.

Not everyone who reads my blog will believe in God, but I do and I can’t deny that fact anymore. Because…God is the only one I should be worrying about impressing. And to impress God means that I don’t conform to how others would want me to act or look or define myself, but rather conform to the image represented by God – love of others, purity, self-control, slow to anger, etc. These are qualities that keep me focused on developing a gentle spirit that longs to see the world come to understand saving grace and acceptance and eventually joy with the understanding that there is life after death – a triumphant life with God – worth pursuing without fear of what others may think.

All that being said, you are going to see a pretty drastic change in the subject matter represented in my blog. I won’t be deleting any posts because I think it is wise to know from what state my heart, perceptions and words have developed and grown. I am not dissatisfied with the words I have been sharing with you thus far; I am just dissatisfied with their content. I’m not ashamed of anything, but I think God has a bigger purpose for this little blurp of space occupying the internet and so I’m planning on making my words count for a higher purpose.

I’m not planning on everyone agreeing with me, but maybe, together we will see how words can truly affect people’s lives for the better. That is why we write in the first place, isn’t it? To persuade people to view life differently. To highlight alternate perceptions of the reality we all share. I hope that you will join me and we can debate issues and conquer questions that plague our hearts. Hopefully, through sharing with you my faith and unaltered opinions on truth and love, we can discover real truth after scraping away all that seems convoluted by jargon and deception.

Star Songs


star songs

If you sit still and listen to silence long enough
You can hear the steady buzz of the world.
Silence is never truly silent.
Inside its self-preserved dome of peace
Silence hums a cyclical song –
Melodic histories.
It woos us into subconscious understanding
With its complex lullaby.
It tells us time and time again
In different ways
How our history is playing out before us;
How our present is just the past verse sung
To an alternate beat
Or with a new instrument.
The world is in a constant state of rotation.
With each turn on our axis
We create a fresh verse
But the sad reality of this lullaby
Is that it is indeed cyclical.
We are doomed to revert back to a state of chorus
Only to rise into a verse
With altered undulation.
We are captured by a dance
Where our steps are determined by the music
That history decides to play.
Lying on the slope of a hill near the crest
When the night sky is clear of clouds
And the moon decides to hide,
You will see a vast expanse of stars.
It is breathtaking.
It is in that moment,
As grass tickles your ears and wind whispers to you,
Do you come to a realization that our world
Is either very small or large.
You discover a sense of where we are in the universe.
Combine this illumination
With Silence.
All at once you are overcome with your realities
Philosophies and dreams
And then
When it feels like the sensation is overwhelming
You suddenly find yourself at peace –
You are in the front row of an orchestra.
A connection is made and all the questions
You have ever felt inside
About your existence bubble outward.
Ancients before you described the stars as history
Transcribed by the gods
And as you stare into them
Past them
You notice that the stars form the notes on a musical staff.
Each is a point in your history –
The world’s history –
Strung together by nature to form the quivering hum you now feel.
I think
It is our nature in times of self-revelation that we analyze;
We delve into the deeper aspects of our curiosity.
One question is bouncing around in your head
More than others, however.
Where are we now?
You wrap your arms under your head and think.
You remember the history taught to you in middle school
And you recall current events.
Are we dancing to the beat of a happy verse?
Something tumultuous
Relaying a sense of change?
Or steady and familiar like the chorus?
How closely does this turn of the axis resemble the past?
How radically unique?
Which notes are my OWN?
It would appear
If we are destined to dance
That our futures are laid out before us without the hope
For significant change.
We will ebb and flow consistently.
But, why?
Our ancestors believed that there was the ability in us –
A gift of sorts which nature grants
That beckons us to change the tune.
If we lie complacent
Satisfied to slumber as the lullaby resonates
Merely in the background of existence
Then we will have no significance to the song.
We will dance as we were meant to dance
Not jive or do the robot or weep interpretively.
And although with each generation
The past is a looming presence
Waiting to be played again
The same way,
We must accept the gift nature has given us;
Be determined
To alter the verse.
Play the notes in the direction
We want our history to unfold.
Be the next whole note to appear on the staff.
Inspire jazz.
Inspire change.
Inspire the perfect song that when the time comes
For it to repeat itself
We will be satisfied to slumber.

Take Control

Take Control

I want to pack myself into a one-man spaceship and rocket past the dead void of space surrounding this cursed Earth and into the warm, vibrantly colored expanse of the Universe that C. S. Lewis describes in the first novel of his science fiction trilogy: Out of lewis-out-178x300Silent Planet. Once there, I would paddle my little ship about till I find where the constellation Orion hangs out. I am absolutely convinced that he is a living, breathing entity, and I would like to sit down with him and hold a very long conversation.

Why Orion?

To be fully honest, the Orion constellation has been the only true constant in my life. No matter where I am in the world, when I look up into the purpled midnight, I spy the three stars that comprise his belt and I know that he is hovering over all that I hold dear to me and guiding me in any direction that I choose. Those three stars are my markers for home, self-pondering, memories, curiosity…He’s my beacon. So, I’d love to ask him a few questions about destiny. Surely he has to have answers since he has been my midnight guardian these last twenty-three years. I’d be tempted to ask him if he could see any outcomes for my future. Perhaps that is a silly notion though because I may want to know my future now, but will it truly benefit me to have such knowledge? In fact, is my future even fully certain? Is it represented as a fixed destination or does it change with each decision I make?

I prefer to think the latter, and I’ll tell you why. I don’t like the idea that I have no control over my Fate. Why should the stars alone decide where my life will end and the paths that I determine to get there? Exactly. Doesn’t seem fair, does it? So I’ve pretty much said…” Nope. I’ve got this one, Orion. Just keep twinkling up there, and I’ll figure this out on my own.” But before I came to make such a bold statement concerning my life, I was extremely fascinated with astrology. Now, I’ve never been a fan of horoscopes and psychics or whatnot, but there was just something that caught my attention when it came to astrological signs. PLUS, I believe in God, so I know that he has knowledge of where I’m headed and he created the stars, right?, so they have to hold some weight in my life. He said, “Observe the Heavens.” Welp, even if I don’t put a whole lot of bunk into astrology, it is fascinating to read about.

My star sign is Scorpio, so I did a bit of digging into what that exactly means for me. I found this killer book about birth dates and whatnot at my local library sale! It was massively thick, and I pretty much stole it for two bucks. In a retail book store, I’m sure it sold for close to fifty bucks. Anyways, I checked out my date and read up on supposedly on my predicted personality. I have this odd habit of quirking my right eyebrow and crinkling my nose to the right when I think something is particularly bogus, and that’s what I did……At first. As I read further, some of it actually made sense and even seemed to fit me quite well. I won’t go into too much detail about what it said since Scorpions apparently like to remain mysterious ;P but one thing in particular stood out to me. The book said that individuals born under the sign of Scorpio are powerful, determined people with vibrant personalities and steadfastness which results in the ability to maintain ultimate control of their destiny.

Well hot diggity, that sounds awesome! Especially since I’ve already decided to do that anyways. But you know, this got me thinking (obviously I do this “thinking” thing a lot), and it made me curious whether or not other individuals are fully capable of maintaining their own destinies. The idea ruminated in my brain for some time till I realized that I was basing my thoughts too much on the reasoning that astrology is 100% accurate, which it’s not. Therefore, I can only assume that we ALL are capable of of achieving the destiny we set out for ourselves. Paths do not matter because we will choose multiple throughout our lifetimes. The KEY is not letting others choose our paths for us. There may be God up there who knows our end results, and we may have our guiding constellations, but ultimately, the decision is ours.